here is a singer
with a new smoking habit of 5-6 years,

a lover of everything

dreamer for days

hater for many more

to say you are a singer

and to say that you have passion to love

to say that all you think about is everything

and everything is nothing once the day is done

a song for every mood

new jobs to fit new suits
a love, a life, maybe a love life too

few thoughts about how to make something

something from something incoherent

fewer ways to grab what's coming

and make it bend your way

i sit here smoking

wondering about singing

still sitting, wondering more about love

if it would have made life worthier of living
and give me something to sing about

love doesn't hurt

when you were away

i thought things would change

change- alright

when you were away

i knew things would change

because it had to happen

we were the way we were

because you were going

and not gone

when you were away

i thought i would change

i would be this amazing dame

..somewhere i am sure i even wore a wig

nothing quite changed

not for the best at least

and now there is this need

this incessant need to simplify

this never ending greed to express

but i can't run after these thoughts

lukewarm

it was lukewarm at it's best

i have been meaning to

its curious, how easy it has been to let this happen

i couldn't make any sort of contact

punishing myself is easier
than just a wrinkle of disappointment on your face

you embody everyone, everyone embodies you

my fear is ready to get to me and it has made its first attack

it has made me judge and treat punishment as a virtue

a virtue that will make me think and rid off my guilt at times

guilt is the oil on my feet

it wont ever allow me to enjoy a walk

and the sweating profusely is no big help

so i sing

but i disturb the peace and quiet